I read somewhere recently that a politician was trying to pass a law mandating that everyone must go to church every Sunday. When I read that, an inspirational voice called out to me and told me that I was specially chosen to form a new religion. I was going about my business quite nicely, when last week, on April 1st to be exact, this inspiring message came to me. It mandated that I form a new religion; my own religion; the religion of “The Invisible Man”.
My doctrine will be that my Deity is everywhere, sees and knows everything, he monitors our every move and thought. He is also responsible for everything good that happens in the world and for the creation of the world itself. If things go bad, he is just trying to send us a message that without him nothing good can happen. We can’t see him of course because he is invisible, but when we die, we will also become invisible and invisible people can see other invisible people.
There is no way that anyone will be able to prove that my deity does not exist, and I am hoping that I will be able to get special treatment for my new religion such as tax breaks and donations from everybody including the government and I will be able to do whatever I please because my religion mandates it. Members of my church, “The church Of The Invisible Man” will not need to worship every week, just on the first of April each year, but everyone is encouraged to send donations to the head of the church, that’s me, in case you forgot, and when I get sufficient donations, I too will become invisible. All members can also become invisible if they recruit enough people to the church and can collect and pass on to me, at least $100K each.
So please, please join my new church as soon as possible so that we can all become invisible and do good things for the people and for ourselves of course.